FAKE CHRISTIANS CHALLENGE CHARLES BARKLEY TO A BASKETBALL GAME
Sir Charles Barkley comments last week on CNN during the NBA All Star Game, has incensed fake Christians at Fox News and everywhere else. A group of skinny, white Christians are challenging him to a basketball game. Here Mr. Barkley is photographed during one of his recent workouts.
Born Again Christians at Oral Roberts University who were incensed at basketball great Charles Barkley slur against their faith last week, during the NBA All Star game, have challenged Mr. Barkley to a basketball game.
“Fake Christians? Wow. I don’t even know how to respond. If he was referring to evangelical leaders like Ted Haggard and Jerry Falwell and Jim Bakker and Jimmy Swaggart, those weren’t fake Christians. They were just non-practicing Christians who were profiting off of other Christians. How is that fake? That’s just good business sense.” Says junior forward, Robert White, III of Tulsa, Oklahoma.
White and the other members of the evangelical Christian university saw the broadcast of Barkley on youtube this weekend. “At first we were going to just boycott the All Star Game but then we would have missed the slam dunk contest and watching Magic Johnson in a business suit while trying to pronounce words with more than 2 syllables and that would have just been punishing ourselves.” White said. Instead they have called out Barkley and will play him in between the first and second rounds at the NCAA Tournament in Anaheim in March.
Barkley is reportedly out of condition and overweight right now. In fact he is so overweight right now that the Scottsdale Country Club has banned Mr. Barkley from stepping onto their putting greens. The golf club’s greens keeper, a Jason Cohn, reportedly suffered a heart attack 2 weeks ago when he saw Mr. Barkley’s Escalade pull into the parking lot.
“Since Barkley is so overweight he’s really like 4 guys. So to keep it fair, he gets to pick one other person. We don’t care who it is. He can pick Jordan if he wants or Joan of Arc for all we care. We can’t lose because we have God on our side.”
Barkley was at a T.G.I.F. Friday’s and unavailable for comment. A spokesperson for Mr. Barkley said, “Charles will play them anytime, anyplace, as long as it doesn’t interfere with any tee times or beer commercial shoots.” Asked about potential playing partners, “Yeah he will probably pick Michael Jordan, not because Jordan is still in great playing shape and can dominate. If these guys play together Nike will be able to commemorate it in shoe form and clear a couple more million this year.”
Asked if Barley wasn’t just a bit worried about the 60 minute match up with 5 young men, who may not have the skills of Sir Charles but are still in excellent condition, the spokesperson responded.
“Charles doesn’t need God on his side, he’s got Jordan and Nike.”
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